Eat This, Fuck That
You are smart, but "healthy living" websites are F**KING stupid.
-
In this “20 Things that can ruin your smile” list-icle (list article) with slide show we are shown amazing things like tobacco and wine that will ruin your teeth with pictures of people smoking and chugging wine. But to illustrate that TEETH grinding will ruin our TEETH, well, this photo says it all. I often wonder about the models for these slide shows, do they know what this is going to be for? She almost looks like she is asking the photographer “Is this right? Is this what teeth grinding looks like?” Was that even what this photo shoot was for or did the “journalist” who wrote this list-icle get this from a “Top 10 Ways to You are Increasing Wrinkles” list-icle under the the title “Scrunching Up Your Face”
Sheesh.
-
It seems like a lot of this stuff is coming from Men’s Health. Maybe its because men didn’t start thinking about eating healthy and dieting in the 90’s when Olestra came out. Men’s body obsession has become a very 21st century thing. Women have known about the leaky side effects of Olestra for YEARS. We were all victims after our mothers packed WOW chips in our lunches in 5th grade….ugh. I can’t wait for the Men’s Health article on Jazzercise and the Atkins diet.
-
When I wanted to fit into my skinny jeans again, I started running 20 minutes a day during my lunch hour. In two months, I’ve lost 20 pounds, have tons of energy, and just finished my first 5K. Those jeans? They’re too big now!” —Lauren Castor, Anniston, AL
I am calling your bluff Lauren Castor of Annistion, AL….there is no way that running a mere 20 minutes a day a) lost you 20 pounds or b) got you ready for your first 5k. Unless you were an extremely sedentary vegetarian former high school track star.
(Source: Yahoo!)
-
Real truffles, whether the white ones from Périgord, are miracles of gastronomy. Truffle oil, a wholly synthetic substance that has come no closer to actual truffles than it has to the surface of the moon, is not. Ever smelled the deer musk that hunters like to smear on themselves during rut? Now imagine that on your next $18 plate of pasta.
Who. The Fuck. Would write something this ridiculous?! Leave it to a food critic to ruin food.
(Source: Yahoo!)
-
My reason for living/blogging. An Eat This, Not That article! In it, we are told, instead of the 1500 calorie large fries at Five Guys, eat some of the regular size fries.
But why, then, can’t I have the Cheesecake Factory Mac and Cheese if I share it with someone, why do I have to get asparagus instead? Or why can’t I get the small Arby’s Mozzarella sticks if I want some fried cheese instead of the large? And how is a side salad a substitute for Chilli Cheese Fries?!
-
In this article, Yahoo Health tells us that water and bright white surfaces in our bathrooms could be plotting our deaths. Then they warn us not to have 30 year old space heaters and broken glass in our bathrooms. Riveting. Life changing. Pulitzer Prize winning journalism.
-
Over the past several decades Americans have steadily gotten fatter. Although our increasingly sedentary lifestyles are partly to blame, a big reason for our national weight gain is that we’re simply eating more.
Leave it to the geniuses over at Yahoo! Health to crack the case on American obesity.
(Source: health.yahoo.net)
-
I’m a huge fan of health bloggers’ tips on stress maintenance. Healthline.com recommends “talking yourself through it”. If talking to yourself is a stress release, the hobos in Madison Square Park must be the most carefree people in New York City.
-
Everyone wants killer abs. And everyone wants to lay on the couch all day. What if you could have both? Well, you can’t. But there are definitely some great ab exercises you can do without leaving your sofa. So if you’re feeling kind of flabby but you really don’t want to turn off the game, here’s how to have the best of both worlds …
I LOVE it when they appeal to the lazy man demo! Odds are if you want to lay on the couch all day, you probably don’t care that much about abs. Or about anything for that matter. You probably haven’t changed your underwear in a few days. So before you take on your “flabby” abs, maybe concentrate on showering.
(Source: thepostgame.com)
-
“Cream cheese fruit dips are perfect for parties and small gatherings with friends or family. Its sweet flavor makes it popular among kids and oldies alike. But, let me just make it clear that cream cheese fruit dips aren’t as good as yogurt fruit dips are. Why? What’s their difference?
What sets the difference is that cream cheese clearly lacks the goodness that yogurt has”
This wisdom brought to you by healthblogtips.com…. way to be on top of this confusing issue.
